Imagine two people who always say wonderful things about each enter a room. The two of them are separated by a gap filled with water and are told that they are supposed to come together.
Person 1 says to Person 2 “Quickly, jump to me so we can be together” Person 2 listens and leaps toward Person 1. Missing by a mere two inches Person 2 falls face first into the gap. He gets up, dries off and Person 1 says, “You are awesome, jump to me so we can be together” Person 2 is pumped and excited and leaps toward the other. Missing again by a mere 2 inches he falls into the water filled gap. Person 2 repeats the step by drying off while Person 1 continues to say wonderful things while encouraging him to jump. Over and over, they repeat the process which continues to end with the same result.
The problem with this is the effort is all one sided.
Some things that could be different:
1. Person 1 could reach out to Person 2, grabbing them and preventing them from falling into the gap.
2. Both could easily meet in the water as equals. No one ever said where they had to come together.
Relationships require effort from more than one person. Where are you in this story?