No matter how hard you try, your kids are going to hear the words you don’t want them to hear. It doesn’t matter who it is your kids are hanging out with or even the context in how they hear them. Eventually a word you don’t want your kids to know about will grace their little ears.
I remember sitting in my living room with my parents and some of their friends from church. I’m guessing I was in Kindergarten, but the exact moment and what happened I remember like it was yesterday. I sat next to my mom, threw up the bird and said, “Mom, this is you!”
I know what your thinking: “You???” Yes. Me. Contrary to popular belief, I’ve done at least 5 things in my life that were wrong……..wait…….phew, my nose is still the same size…
Now I’m 34 years old with two boys of my own, and my oldest is at the point where, whether I like it or not, will be hearing words that I wouldn’t want him to repeat.
The last thing I want him to do is be so shocked when he hears a word that he runs or freaks out, and I definitely don’t want him to come home and flip off his mother in front of her church friends. (although I’d probably have to turn my head to hide the laughter)
What I do with my kids is not based on protection, but on equipping. Whether I tell him the bad words or whether his friends do, doesn’t really matter. Understanding the situation and how to handle it is what I’m concerned about.
My talks on bad language or behavior with my oldest go something like this. “We are all raised a certain way. The beliefs and standards of others aren’t always going to be the same as ours. You’re going to mess up numerous times, and surprisingly, I’m going to be ok with that. It’s how you handle yourself and mature from that point. Although some may use foul language to express themselves, that is not how we as a family talk. I also talked with him about the difference in foul language and how sometimes it’s used to describe things and how sometimes it’s used to insult people. The latter is something I will not tolerate.”
I’m a lot more lenient with my kids when it comes to certain things than the way that I was raised. I try to look behind the heart of their actions. If their intentions were to be hurtful, my response is much more different than what it would be if it was harmless. Saying your ass hurts and calling someone an ass are two different things in my book.
And of course it’s never too early too teach your kids not to do drugs either: